And twenty minutes starting now. There will be no proof reading for this since I am supposed just let my thoughts flow like a broken water pipe. OK, maybe I will do a spell check. This is almost a scary assignment, just letting all thoughts come out. It could lead to some weird dark places if you are in that state of mind. Thoughts that could be self deprecating, or worse, self destructive.
That is the danger here, letting loose to an unknown audience, not knowing how receptive this audience will be. Do they really want to read the thoughts from people’s minds as they are created? Should they be reading those thoughts? What happens if someone starts spewing thoughts that were never meant to get to the outside world?
It could also be the mundane, like the train passing by building. good thing it was only a passenger train. It was only thirty seconds long. Sometimes, when the freight trains go by, all that can be heard is banging and clanging of rail cars, and the inevitable horn, which must always by blown since there is train crossing nearby. The good part is the train drowns out the death metal band and the crappy “indie” band practicing in the building across the alley. When those bands start, I pray for freight trains. Good thing the bands usually stop at 10:00PM or 11:00PM. And then silence, until the next train goes by, with the inevitable horn and rail cars banging away.
That is enough about death metal and trains. Weird combo, but where I live that is the norm.
And now here we are, ten minutes and I am writing about the clock that I just checked, which I should not be. Kind of defeats the purpose of this mental exercise. It is like when you are at work, and at 10:30AM look at the clock and think to yourself only three more hours until there is four and half hours left in the day. That is when the day drags on. You are given problem to work out. It seems interesting at first, then other things start piling up. Errands that need to be run. Car insurance that needs dealing with. Thoughts of love and loss. And everything outside of your work conspires to create the longest day ever. Because you can not stop looking at the clock. You can not stop looking at Facebook to see you can message them. And then it happens again the next day, and the day after that. Until you realize that the whole time you have been sitting at your desk, sitting in meetings, you mind has been anywhere but in the present. And now the last week and a half feels like four months. And now every day stretches out to a month. You come in the next morning and you completely forgot where you left off the night before. But it does not matter. Not much got done the day before, because you spent the day looking at the clock. Checking when it was OK to get up for your next smoke break. For a quick snack. For anything other than work, because for some reason, at work, you can not focus on the task at hand. And your mind is back to creating thoughts about things it can not control.
Wow. What a rant. I look back at that wonder where that came from. Are these the thoughts that should pass through a filter before being sent into world?